Ask your kids if they know of any friends or acquaintances that are financially in need. Have them pick out a present that person would appreciate and leave it for them anonymously.

Every dollar you spend communicates what you value. Even if you can afford everything you want (or everything your kids want), it may be smarter to refrain from fulfilling those desires. Do not let innovation and technology drive your purchases. Make decisions on what you spend money on based on what you value and what is important to you. Before you buy, think through the implications of purchasing a piece of technology, which could turn into a time thief and shape the wrong values. If that means you don’t get the flat screen TV that you’ve wanted for years, then so be it.

Fathers and mothers who get a monetary bonus from their employer and spend that money on indulging themselves on cutting-edge technology only make the family even more chaotic by inviting more media into the house. Before you buy, think about the effect every purchase will have on your family. Have the wisdom to show restraint. Owning every toy that has been invented is not the path to freedom and happiness. You need to decide in advance what kind of family you want to have and the values you want them to emulate. Then allow your purchases to line up with those values. Even though your ego will not be thrilled in the moment, your family will be thrilled in the long term. Instead of buying that latest gadget, gather your family together and decide on a family of one or more friends that you can bless instead with that money. It doesn’t have to be huge, just thoughtful. Let your teens pick out the present and let it be your secret.